Anonymous emails and small miracles
Mood:  bright
Topic: Life

Anonymous email and small miracles :)
Current mood: blessed
Category: Life

I guess for awhile off and on I have been open to seeing synchronicity everywhere or in other words, small miracles. Most days, especially on days when my mood is not so bright, I am blind to them, but I have really been working hard since I started studying Kabbalah to remember that I am the cause of my own life and also to not be reactive to things, including things that I would feel really really upset or angry about or worse that would scare me. And now even those situations when I remember I and everybody are connected to the Light, become small miracles, sometimes even large miracles in their own right because they are the best tests and opportunities for me to reveal more Light and to learn something new.

Today, maybe because it is Shabbat, or maybe because I have been feeling especially contemplative and vigilant since my Kabbalah class last night, I have felt really connected and in that Love zone. Not an in love or romantic love zone, but that Love from the Universe, ie G-d zone. The one that makes me proudly sound like a happy go lucky G-d loving lady. The one that makes me feel connected to everyone and everything. It was a morning where even the songs I wanted to hear were playing on the radio.

And then the best miracle of all happened! I got an anonymous email - you know from an (unknown sender) so no email and sent from an Internet based anonymous email provider that allows people to send emails so that the recipient cannot trace the email address or the name of the sender. Now why is this a miracle? Usually when someone uses this kind of service, they are attempting to spread hate or anger or hurt to a person. And I don't doubt that maybe that was the intention of whoever sent the email to me.

But I don't feel hurt. I feel grateful for the email because it was a great test. Because I am a known poet locally and have an online presence as a writer as well, I have attracted both positive and negative attention. In the past when I would receive something even vaguely troll-like or stalker-ish, I would have felt both angry and afraid. But this morning I felt sort of amused and like I said before grateful.

But there was another miracle in the email. The words of the email itself were a reminder of my Kabbalah lessons because the email read "WHAT THE HELL YOU LOOKING FOR!!!!" and it made me think and remember that I and everybody else are looking for the Light which we experience as a feeling of fulfillment and that I really would rather have long term fulfillment and do the work to earn that fulfillment than short term fulfillment which may feel more comfortable initially and easier but which eventually just causes chaos in my life.

So whoever you are, mr or ms anonymous email sender I thank you and send you Light. Your message was a gift from the Creator :)

Ok everybody remember we are all the cause of our own lives and the Light is always on, even during what feels like our darkest hours :)

Currently reading : The Power of Kabbalah: Technology for the Soul By Yehuda Berg